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Tanya - honouring her beautiful soul

Updated: Jul 21, 2021



The disarming smile on the picture below belongs to Tanya Macrae. On May 12th, 2021 Tanya walked into the light. She walked into the light way too soon - way too soon to experience more of life she loved so much.

 


A Life that touches others goes on forever. ~ Unknown





I had a difficult time to decide if I could write this blog. Shortly after I got the news that she was no longer with us physically, I had an idea of writing a blog as a tribute to this lovely woman. I felt that in the current situation with social distancing we can't even get together and properly honour and celebrate Tanya's life. My blog seemed to be a perfect way that I could put together some words and photos I have of Tanya, her family and her friends. On the other hand, I didn't want to be insensitive by posting it on the business website. After hearing from Tanya's sons that it would be a nice tribute to their mom, I decided to go ahead and write this blog.


 


It is hard to accept that a beautiful woman, two years younger than me, full of love and laughter had to leave this world. I am having a difficult time to find the right words. This blog is mostly about photos though. Photos which at one point really become priceless and the most precious keepsake we have.


I met Tanya through our friend, Lisa a few years ago. Even though I didn't see Tanya very often, and we weren't real close friends, we did have a few very deep and meaningful conversations (and, if you knew Tanya, you can imagine that besides some tears, we shared lots of laughter too.)


 

I had Tanya in front of my camera for the first time when I was shooting Lisa's tribe. "The Parksville girls", as I call them, even though they are not all from Parksville and they are women more so than girls. I call them girls because they all have young and adventurous spirits. They are a tight bunch and I can't imagine how much they miss Tanya. This shoot happened on August, 2019 in Parksville on a warm and sunny evening. It was a fun (and busy) session, with bright colours, VW van, sunset and lots of laughter. Here is a few pictures with Lisa, Roxi, Paula, Kristie, Candace, and Tanya.





 


... and I always thought these girls are inseparable.






The true West Coast Soul Sisters


























 

I hadn't planned on taking individual photos, but I managed to get a few shots of Tanya,

and I am so glad I did.





 



When I see Tanya in this picture, I know that she is still here.










 



I was shocked and saddened when Tanya got diagnosed with cancer the first time a few years ago. I felt like I need to do something to help. I thought the best way to help is to offer what I do and I gave Tanya a gift of photography. She was busy with treatment and getting healthy again and we never got to schedule our session. Until last December.









 



Meet Tanya and her sons Devon and Braydon, and Braydon's girlfriend Marie. Beautiful and strong people, beautiful and strong family.






 


The love of Tanya's life - her sons.














 




 

Braydon and Marie. They are not only the cutest couple but they are also very supportive to each other and the whole family.




The girls and the boys.











Can you see the love in Tanya's eyes? I sure can. Abundance of it.










 


This picture was Tanya's pick to print and frame as Christmas presents for family. I think she chose well.





When I started photography I didn't realize how emotional this profession really is. My clients go through happy times and successes, as well as trials and tribulations of life, and share those with me. This photo shoot was hands down the most challenging shoot I have done. By the time Tanya decided to have the session we already knew that the prognosis was not good. I took time to prepare myself, get the session planned to the t. As Tanya wanted to have a beach shoot I went to Rathtrevor beach to scout the location and I had the exact spots chosen and numbered, and time of the day set based on the best light. It was a very important shoot to me and I wanted to do my best. We arrived the day of the shoot to the beach and it was so windy, that the shoot couldn't happen at the beach. I was so prepared but I failed at having plan B with a second location. We had to improvise and start shooting in the campground, between the trees. I was shooting with a mask and my viewfinder was all foggy. I did my best to stay focused (literally and figuratively) to have the shoot done relatively fast as it was tiring for Tanya. Besides the technical challenges, there was the biggest challenge of all - how to do my job and not to just sit down on a stump and cry my eyes out. I am humbled and grateful that I could be with this beautiful family at this time. I will never forget that.


 

I learned so much that day. I learned about people's strength, courage and family bond. I learned about acceptance. And I witnessed love. Pure love.






 









"You can shed tears that she is gone, or you can smile because she has lived. You can close your eyes and pray that she'll come back, or you can open your eyes and see all she's left. Your heart can be empty because you can't see her, or you can be full of the love you shared. You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday, or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday. You can remember her only that she is gone, or you can cherish her memory and let it live on. You can cry and close your mind, be empty and turn your back. Or you can do what she'd want: smile, open your eyes, love and go on.


David Harkins






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